TheQueerCafe

Gender dysphoria sucks, here are some tips that might help lessen the blow. I'd like to give a big thanks to my dear internet friend N.J. (DexinDraws (https://www.deviantart.com/dexindraws)) for inspiring me and adding their own thoughts to this chapter! Reading stories with respectful trans representation. Examples: My Quest To A Beard by Alex Bertie (non-fiction), I Am J by Cris Beam (fiction), and By Any Other Name by L1av (online fan-fiction). Watching entertaining transgender YouTubers. Example: Ty Turner (trans-male). Watching shows/movies with respectful trans representation. Example: One Day At A Time (Netflix Original). Wearing graphic t-shirts from the men's/boy's secti

The "original" lesbian flag, also known as the lipstick lesbian flag (which is what I will be referring to it as from now on), was created by This Lesbian Life on Wordpress. The flag has always had a bit of controversy behind it because of its design and creator, but over time, more and more and more people have been opposed to it. I won't be going into all the controversy though (maybe another time), but instead will be discussing the "new" lesbian flag that's been going around. There has been many new flag proposals created over the years, but none of them have really stuck unfortunately. Recently though, a tumblr user by the name of anurt

Important to know; User A is the one who made the post I'm describing, User B is the user that user a is talking about in their post. The reason I'm making this post is because it's important to educate people like User A so that people like User B don't get hurt (when they've already been hurt enough). I also understand what it's like to have people not take you or your triggers seriously, and it sucks (understatement of the century). I saw a vent today on DeviantArt where User A went on and on about how they called User B "dear" in a comment they left on one of their artworks and User B replied and asked them not to call them "dear" becaus

Some important messages since it's National Coming Out Day. Please don't stress out over coming out just because it's National Coming Out Day. If you're ready to come out then yeah go for it! But it doesn't matter if it's October 11th or any other date, come out when you're ready! On another note: It's okay to not know what labels to use for yourself, it's perfectly fine to switch labels when you find something more fitting, it's alright if you're LGBTQ+ but don't like using exact labels for yourself, etc. I understand that some people are afraid of coming out because of these reasons, which is why I'm mentioning them specifically. If you'r

Labels have always been a struggle for me, I've known that I wasn't cisgender or heterosexual for the longest time but I couldn't figure out exactly what I was. I'm a very precise person so not being able to find an exact label for myself was impossible to accept. I kept searching and searching but I still couldn't figure it out and it drove me crazy because I so desperately wanted to belong but I felt that I couldn't be a part of the queer community without a set it stone label (which I now know isn't true). I kept switching from label to label just to see if something would stick, but nothing ever felt right 100% of the time. It was like o

A "deadname" is the birthname of someone who has changed their name, typically only used for trans/nonbinary people but not always. You don't have to change your name if you don't want to or don't see a reason to, but this chapter is made for those who do wish to change their name. Some find it easy picking out a name, others not so much. Remember that there's no pressure in finding a name, take your time and find what's right for you! Here's some stories of how other trans/nonbinary people (including myself) found their name (and feel free to comment with your story).... I'm a trans guy and my name is Colin. My dad passed away when I was th

Neopronouns are pronouns commonly used by people who lie outside the gender binary (she/her and he/him). Neoponouns (nonbinary pronouns) can be confusing when you're first trying to figure them out, so I decided to make a little guide on how to use them correctly! I obviously wasn't able to include all neopronoun sets, so I listed the top five most common ones I've seen! If you're curious how any other neopronouns sets work then feel free to comment with them or privately message me! Pronoun Sets: He | Him | His | Himself She | Her | Hers | Herself They | Them | Theirs | Themselves (or Themself) Ze | Zir | Zirs | Zirself Xe | Xir | Xirs